JUST LET GO... - A Poem

JUST LET GO...

Great sorrow of truth, of life

It goes on, without any care for others.

Doesn't spend a dime for whom it bothers.

It indeed is as cruel as Agamemnon's wife.

Life goes on, indeed it does.

It doesn't wait for you to catch up.

It just moves, rapidly, superbly morose.

You just can't over make it stop.

So, let it go, on its own lonely path,

Let it go as you let go a trapped bird.

The more you try to hold on, the more you feel its wrath,

So, just let go, and laugh at it with all your mirth.

PARADOXICAL FUTURE - A Poem

PARADOXICAL FUTURE

What will happen in the future?

I wish I knew the answer!

Whether I will die young or

Live till a ripe old age, alive for years!

Knowing my failures prior,

To them actually happening to me.

Will it fill me with anxiety so crippling,

That my failures become a self-fulfilling prophecy?

Or, will it enable me to overcome them,

And turn  them into sweet fruits of a successful being?

But, won't my failures-turned-successes

Show again in my future sightings?

Then, shouldn't I feel content, and

Let the failures overcome the would-be-successes?

This baffles me so, this constant tortuous path

This is a living paradox-living, breathing, changing.

The future is The Labyrinth, this is the truth

Forever winding and unwinding, just as we almost unravel it.

DEAD ASPIRATIONS - A Poem

Dead Aspirations

A night yet again passed by,

With my child craving for a tricycle.

My beloved coveting to confront her ailing Mumma with a sigh,

And I postponing as usual, my character so typical.

The building shook, my bones within rattling,

The earth seemed to dislodge itself from the universe.

I grabbed my family, with the terror within me rising,

Just as the world came apart at its seams.

Voices first reached by desensitised ears,

Then I felt the still bodies of my existence pressed about me.

Comprehension dawned on me with an intensity fierce,

And I felt my life ebbing away from me.

Rescue had arrived, and maybe I would survive,

But all those dead aspirations cut me like sharpened knives

If I would but give up profit-making businesses for a day,

My family would have died all merry and gay.

How to respond to the calls of the rescuers,

When I desired to accompany my family in their tours?

My life wanted to come to a stand-still,

All I craved for was the fulfilment of my loved one's will.

LOVE TIES - A Poem

Love Ties

Oh! I wish I had never loved.

These paltry human emotions that fetter us to this world.

I wish I had never had,

These human weaknesses, I wish I'd never had.

I could float away in oblivion,

With all my senses ruptured.

Not a breath to be heard, and not a thought to think, 

That would be my Paradise, glimpsed in a wink.

I know now, how love torments you,

Not my sour memoirs, but by sweet memories.

Oblivion becomes a distant dream to you,

When you hear your beloved's pleading cries.

Being chained and fettered with soft silken ropes,

Leaves a cut deep when pulled against to be free.

They don't kill, but keep you alive,

They do everything but let you flee.

I would have gone into my Paradise,

If not for these ties of silken ropes.

They are called bravery, but it is all lies,

It is love, not bravery that holds us so.

Tess Of The D'Urbervilles-- review from teenager's POV.

TESS OF THE D'URBERVILLES: A REVIEW 

 

I think that it is the best Victorian book ever written. It can be considered revolutionary for THAT era, but may seem conservative to most of the present day readers. It's a book that will make you ponder on so many worthy questions about love, life, freedom, personality, and what not. You'll find yourself digging up in the deep recesses of mind for the answers. You'll empathize with the protagonist, will accept her with all her faults, exaggerate her merits, downplay her demerits. You'll question whether what we have in OUR society is any better or not.

Let's first start with the plot. 

The story takes place in an area of England, to the southwest of London in the late 19th Century. This is mainly about a country girl bestowed with all the fine features that were supposed to make a girl beautiful in that Victorian Era- thick long tresses of hair, snowy white satin smooth skin, rosy lips, expressive and large eyes; in short, the Snow White of the era ( by the way, the character of Snow White is not a modern day contraption, in fact, it is an old European tale and was published by the Grimm Brothers in 1812 ). Her father got to know of their lineage with the D'Urbervilles- a powerful knightly family that had died out. He forced his daughter-Tess or Teresa to go work for Alec D'Urbervilles, and charm him into marrying her. But Tess did not fancy Alec, who was an impostor, by the way- his father got rich in business and bought the D'Urbervilles title. Alec got entranced by Tess' beauty and raped and impregnated her. When her parents got to know that she did not take up Alec on his offer of marrying her, they were furious, and her father refused to provide for her child and let it die of sickness. Tess went away from her birthplace to Talbothays, a dairy farm. Here she fell passionately in love with Angel Clare- the Parson's son who wanted to enter into farming. She tried to tell him about her past, but couldn't gather enough courage up until the night they got married. Angel was deeply hurt and abandoned her, leaving her with some money. Tess managed on her own, till Alec came back in her life. She pleaded with Angel to come back to her, but he was too late. Alec forced Tess to marry him by supporting her mother and her siblings when her father passed away. Angel returned and found Tess, only to know she married Alec. Tess, on the other hand, killed Alec because he blinded her with his cruel words about Angel and brainwashing her into marrying him. She and Angel ran away, spend some beautiful days together on the run, but finally got caught up at Stonehenge, where Tess was arrested. She was hanged, and Angel honored her last wish of marrying her sister.

MISTAKEN GIFT.

Chapter 1.

I'm so tired of this long day! Really! What are these people playing at? Seriously? We have to prepare a presentation on the whole giant topic of "Jane Austen's Life, Work and Love" in a week?! A paltry seven days' time to finish, polish and present a topic which has taken literary researchers decades, even centuries?! Well, I can't do anything. It's my senior year after all.  And I've to do it to get good grades. I've to get a good job, because apparently I -- Sanjana Suryavanshi commonly known as Sanju, am to damn poor to get along for even a couple of days without the support of my over-the top rich parents, who by the way, have withdrawn their oh-so helpful hands on learning that I was going to opt English Literature. Just pure awesome! Thankfully, I wasn't that stupid, so I got a scholarship to my college. But that won't help me at all if I don't manage to get a job, will it? So, I just gotta do it. No other option baby...

With a heavy heart, a salivating mouth and a grumbling tummy at the lost prospect of gupchup that evening, I set out to the nearby internet cafe, with a Rs.20 clutched in my hand. As expected, the cafe was full of guys downloading porn covertly. Hah! As if they can be so stealthy, with the constant looking over their shoulders, smacking their lips and making odd sounds. Really, guys had no control whatsoever. Here I am, walking down the narrow passage between the two rows of computers, with complete dedication etched on my sincere face, and here are these 'Fifty-Shades loving' desperate guys. What a stark difference between our personalities! Anyway, I finally find an engaged, moldy looking computer, just beside a guy hunched over a stack of papers typing furiously onto the keyboard. I'm kind of curious about this exception to the human male species. But, I've to get on with my work. I can't waste my time wondering about exceptions to all cases. 

After an hour's of religious searching, data collection and letting of my Rs.20, I finally walk towards my hostel. But I just can't help but notice Mr. Exception barreling towards me, like a charging bull. Before I can even utter a note of surprise, I'm shoved rather rudely and unceremoniously out of the way. Ouch! It really hurts when you fall on the hard ground, with a muscular ( though handsome) guy pinning you to the dirty road. i turned my head sideways and saw a bull charging through the place I'd just been standing in. What a surprise. I'll have to be careful with my similes from now on, as they tends to happen. 

After getting a lot of sorry from his side, and a few thank you from my side, we finally get to know each others names. This dark, handsome knight in Armour has an equally royal name--Anant Chandravanshi. We exchanged numbers, of course. But It's not like I like him, ok? It's plain gratitude. plus, he seemed a studious guy. Above all, he seemed to have a good nature, and that is mighty rare dude. Anyway, I think he'll be good friend. I'm so not gonna explain how he looks, it'll just undermine his rugged handsomeness. Just imagine a light dark rough expanse on a beautiful sunset. No delicate flowers swaying with the wind, no green grass covering the grounds. Just plain beauty, like Earth showing off its beauty, its strength. His dark eyes so deep, his hair so dark, his skin golden brown, lashes fanning his cheeks, eyebrows raised in question, sometimes crunched in worry... Well, don't think that I'm in love! I'm just brushing up my literary skills, see how poetic I've become! 

I've been thinking about him since I reached my room. Shall I call him? No. That'll seem foolish. But I don't seem to have much friends. Just one. And that too, she's going away forever in two days time. It's her marriage. Most of the Arts students are married by the time they reach their last year. Hence, my empty room. No, I won't call him. Let him do so. After all, he was the one who asked my number first. Well, I wait and wait and wait..finally I text him a joke. Let's see what happens...

Just an excerpt...

I feel frustrated! I feel stranded! I don't know why I am feeling like this. Am I still in love with him? My instant response is No, but I think it is just because I was dreading the answer. I 'm gonna try once again...do I love him? Yes. My first faint response is yes. Can I imagine a world without him? No. Can I live without him? No.
I still feel like crying whenever I hurt him -- physically or emotionally. I still get damn worried when he doesn't pick up my calls or answer my messages. But, I feel as if...as if I can't spend anymore time with him. I feel that my time with him is numbered--limited. I am afraid. I am afraid that I will not be here anymore. That I will be dragged away someplace far away..I am afraid that I'm not good enough. I am afraid that I will be lonely. I am afraid that he will at last see some sense..and will then leave me.
I think that the main reason that I am angry and unsure is that he wasn't there for me when I needed him acutely. Yes, that is the reason. I realized that I had become dependent on him...I had considered him to be my rock. But he wasn't there in two circumstances...one of them way bigger for me to handle all alone. It frightened me. It felt like deja-vu. It has happened before. And that time too I lost a loved one. I'm not angry at him...not disappointed...but I have this strange foreboding....something bad is going to happen to me. I am angry at myself..at my luck..or rather, my fate. I am angry at everyone.
I can't tell him...I know. He will either apologize or try to reassure me. I want neither..as I know..it is neither his fault nor his duty. I don't want to worry him. I really want our relationship to work. So. I can't ever tell him that we have got much less time together. It will break his heart. And, I won't be able to stand it...


Hey, friends!! Just an excerpt. Nothing else. I'm thinking of making a story out of it. That is, if you all like excerpt. Even if the story really does takes place...one chapter at a time....
Cheerio!!!!!